kwikloses

So here we are, approaching the final 60 days prior to my wedding and boy oh boy are things getting exciting……………….and stressful………………….and interesting, to say the least. I think we (my mom, mostly) has everything under control, but I can’t help but get stressed out too. I’m still trying to find a balance between work, wedding planning, gym, studying, etc etc etc. Ouch, my head hurts.

I hope to be able to take a new hold of the phrase, “let go, let God.” But I can be such a dang control freak… ha! Oh, the joy of admitting it. I hadn’t been sleeping well for the past 2 ish weeks, so I took a week off from the gym and stuck just to going for a run after work to give myself more time to sleep. It seems to have gotten better and I think I will start at the gym again, tonight. I haven’t done a weigh in in a bit and I am nervous about that too…

Then the big stressor… Today I came to the realization that I might not make it home for my wedding… Depending on weather, days/flights available, etc, my wedding could be a challenge. I have been laughing off this theory for the past 6 months, and now suddenly it has hit me upside the back of the head. And it hurts… All I can do is hope everything lines up accordingly for me. But on a lighter note, I bought the book, Tuesdays with Morrie. WOW. I LOVED it. very interesting, thought provoking, and passionate book. Can’t stop thinking about how good it was. I strongly recommend it to all.Have a wonderful day, friends.~K 

AHHH! So it’s not even summer yet and the heat here in
Iraq is kicking my butt! But on the brighter side of things; yesterday at the gym, I dared to step on the scale since I missed out of Fridays weigh in… and I weighed in at 150!!! Ahhh! I cannot wait for the day when I no longer have to go to the 150 mark!!! SO EXCITING! So motivating! I am seeing muscles in my body that I haven’t seen in a long time! I am really making myself proud… J

Have a great Thursday everyone!

~K

I haven’t written in a few days and I apologize for that. Things here have become really busy and at times hectic. Not only that but I am constantly unable to use the internet due to cruddy connections with the satalite etc…

Yesterday, I had the m-16 range. It had been a while (like too long) since I shot a weapon, so I was pretty nervous. BUT, surprisingly enough, I was able to fire a 38 out of 40 and qualify expert! This is really great because I will be able to turn my score in for more promotion points (yey)! I am taking a pt test in the first week of April. I hope to do really well on that, and be able to get some points for that also.

I am also trying to pull last min details together for the wedding in June! Two days ago, we hit the 3 months remaining mark. Very hectic at times to get stuff together! So exciting! I had my weigh in friday, wasnt too thrilled. lost about 1.5 pounds… oh well, one foot, than the other, right?

 Hope everyone had a good weekend. (it’s Sunday night for me!)

Off to the gym!

~K

So I think I found a solution to my “issue” with myself feeling competitive towards my soldier, *A*. Tonight I had her take an hour off of her shift to come to the gym with me. I loved it. We had a blast on the cardio machines (of course avoiding that dang elliptical!). I challenged myself to run a bit longer than I originally intended to, and challenged her to stay on the elliptical longer than she intended. Then she taught me a few core workouts and abdominal work outs that I could benefit from, and I helped her work her calves. It was very motivating for both of us and no tension at all. I really wish I could have kept her on day shift with me and we could go together regularly… Weigh in and a longer blog with some alternative perspectives will come tomorrow. Yey for Fridays… (HAHA… like that makes a difference here!).Is home. ~K

For those who have taken the time to not only comment me, but thank me, I would like to say “thank you”. But part of me wants to say there is truly no reason to thank me. Being here, on deployment to
Iraq is a well known and (for me was) an accepted part of my job. I chose to do this for several different reasons, and none of which were to be a hero to others.

Really, this place isn’t all that terrible. I really have it lucky in comparison to those who served before me and those with more difficult jobs. I can only be thankful to them for getting us where we are today. As I march on out here, I continue to count down the time till I come home.

I appreciate all your support and such in both my weight loss ventures and my service. I really hope I can surprise my family with the amount of change I hope to achieve. Luckily, we have ample opportunity available to head to the gym and whatnot. Make the best out of a bad situation, right?

Take care, and Happy Friday to you all.

~K

There is another female soldier in my section. A rarity it is to find females in this job… but two is the same unit? Somewhere, pigs must be actively sprouting wings… J *A* came to this company after I did, but she has been in for nearly 6 years now hit two. She arrived a bit on the heavy side. She is really good at our job and I have taken every ample opportunity to learn from her. Now we are deployed, and out of no where, she gets this motivation inside her to pass a physical fitness evaluation and pass weight/tape (the military has weight to height limits and she has not passed one in nearly 3 of those 6 years enlisted). So after 3 months of her challenge, she quit smoking, lost 20 pounds and passed both the fitness and weight portions.

This makes me feel two things. One, I feel incredibly excited for her. As my soldier, I aim to have all 4 of my soldiers meeting/exceeding the standards… she has also become my only female friend out here and we are truly there for each other. She has become like a sister and I am proud that she accomplished her goals thus far.

But, part of me is worried. I have grown accustomed to being considered the (more) fit female, despite my fitness digression (I tend to hide that really well). And I am beginning to worry that I may come second. Being that I have been placed in a position above her on the leadership level, I need to be the example for her, nothing less. That is the exact point the promotion board made to me this past week; “Set the example”.

 Now A has been losing inches and pounds like no tomorrow and it’s both inspiring and challenging. I know that if she can do it, I can too. I have always been so competitive (although I have to keep that under wraps, too!), and she has become yet another motivating force for me. She tells me daily about her work out she has done, and now, I have started taking what she has done and double it. I try to keep from announcing it, as I fear she may suspect what I am doing as something to spite her… and I really don’t want to give that perception.

Leadership: The ability to influence people, providing purpose, direction and motivation, while working to accomplish the mission and working to improve the organization.

-How can I be a leader if I am following?

~K

I happened to find the motivation one night to pull out a camera and that is where it all began.

No, I didn’t attempt to take any type of risky photos of myself… instead, I wanted to see what I don’t like about me. So here I was, taking auto-pics in my athletic undergarments and I found the beging of what I called “The last day I will feel helpless”.

A little about me. I am a 22 year old soldier, currently deployed to Iraq. This is my first deployment. 

My profile will contain lots of pictures, all of which will be faceless. At this point in time, I don’t have it in me to be that open. There is hope, that one day, when I reach my goal, I will find the courage to include a not so faceless photo. Hope.

As time goes on I plan to blog a bit about the type of person I am, the challenges I face, the motivating factors and the progress I hope to be making. I hope you enjoy.

~Kwik